Sugarcane

language is never just [[language]]

[[no|no4]], [[maybe?]]

<<timedremove 8s>>embody this \n<<timedinsert 3s>>negative space<<endtimedinsert>><<endtimedremove>><<timedremove 13s>><<timedinsert 10s>>[img[bathroomsign2.png]]<<endtimedinsert>><<endtimedremove>><<timedinsert 14s>>[[--]]<<endtimedinsert>>

create a beautiful system\n<<timedcontinue 3s>>create [[choice]]

zir [[or|or2]] hir

<<timedremove 4s>>this life and body are sometimes dissonant<<endtimedremove>><<timedinsert 5.5s>> it is different from mere [[noise]]<<endtimedinsert>>

<<timedremove 5s>>how many times have you been underlined\nor circled in red?<<endtimedremove>><<timedinsert 6s>> nearly always seen as a mistake<<endtimedinsert>>\n<<timedcontinue 7s>>as made-up\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>not [[real]]

<<timedremove 2.2s>> it <<endtimedremove>><<timedinsert 3.5s>> <<timedremove 2s>> it<<endtimedremove>><<endtimedinsert>><<timedinsert 7.5s>> <<timedremove 2s>> it<<endtimedremove>><<endtimedinsert>><<timedinsert 12s>><<continue "artist">> artist/ <<continue "queer">> queer/ <<continue "person">> person/ <<continue "body">> body/ <<continue "skin">> skin/ <<continue "flesh">> [[flesh]]<<endtimedinsert>>

<<fadeinsound "children 2.mp3">><<timedremove 7s>>Exibit A: \n\nwill not choose between playing with boys\nand playing with girls\n\nmother is told by teacher that this is unusual<<endtimedremove>><<timedremove 15s>><<timedinsert 9s>>Exibit B:\n\nyoung girl shoved into boys' bathrooms\nbruised, scratched, crying\nconfused by whatever it is they see<<endtimedinsert>><<endtimedremove>><<timedcontinue 17s>>Exibit C:\n\nstares into mirror at developing breasts\n\nremembers a movie in which a girl \nused duct tape\nto make them disappear for a time\n\ndoes not [[blink]] at torn skin

[[he]] <<timedcontinue 2s>> [[she]] <<timedcontinue 2s>> [[it]]

<<continue "artist">> artist/ <<continue "queer">> queer/ <<continue "person">> person/ <<continue "body">> body/ <<continue "skin">> skin/ <<continue "flesh">> flesh/ <<continue "blood">>[[blood]]

my own negation surprises [[me|no4]]\n

[[he?]] [[she?]] [[they?]] [[ze?]]

if that is all we are\n<<timedcontinue 3s>>why do we require more [[evidence]] of our being?

it would have been a half truth\n\n<<timedcontinue 3s>> always half [[truths|no4]]

<<if $he eq 1 and $she eq 1>>\n<<display "next">>\n<<else>>\n<<display "two2">>\n<<endif>>

[[no|archeologists2]]

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<<timedremove 9s>>"Escape is the need to get out of oneself\n\n<<timedinsert 3s>>to break that most radical and unalterably binding of chains,<<endtimedinsert>><<endtimedremove>><<timedinsert 10.5s>>the fact that the I [[is]] oneself”<<endtimedinsert>>

heartbeat <<timedcontinue 2s>>skin <<timedcontinue 1s>>sweat <<timedcontinue 1s>>drip\n<<timedremove 8s>><<timedinsert 4s>>my hands become clammy when you stare<<endtimedinsert>><<endtimedremove>><<timedremove 15s>><<timedinsert 9s>>wipe them on my <<cyclinglink "pants" "skirt">><<endtimedinsert>><<endtimedremove>><<timedinsert 17s>>I can't stop the question of whether you are trying to discern what is [[beneath]]<<endtimedinsert>>

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that question of [[real|real2]]

it is about what you see\n<<timedcontinue 2s>> what you claim\n<<timedcontinue 2s>> what you inscribe upon the [[body]]

[[he|no3]] [[she|no3]] [[ze]]

[[he|he4]] [[she|she4]]

I'm so tired of this [[question]] of real

<<cyclinglink "yes" "no" "yes" "no" "yes" "no">> <<timedcontinue 4s>> or [[?|no6]]\n\n<<silently>> <<set $he =1>>\n<<endsilently>>

<<fadeoutsound "electronic.mp3">>occupy the [[breaths]] between

one does not have to feel like\n\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>neither\n\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>to feel constrained \nand torn\n\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>by [[two]]

[[please]]

--"stop me if this is not okay to ask...<<timedcontinue 3s>>but isn't it hard to be in that ambiguous space?<<timedcontinue 2s>>Don't you want to be seen as [[something]]?"

<<timedremove 8s>>at a local cafe\nprinted across the bathroom door:\n<<timedcontinue 2.5s>>half of what stands for a woman\n<<timedcontinue 2.5s>>half of what stands for a man<<endtimedremove>><<timedremove 15s>><<timedinsert 10s>>[img[bathroomsign2.png]]<<endtimedinsert>><<endtimedremove>>\n<<timedcontinue 16.5s>>neutrality always seems to be synonymous \n<<timedcontinue 2.5s>> with [[both]]

<<cyclinglink "yes" "no" "yes" "no" "yes" "no">><<timedcontinue 4s>> or [[?|no6]]\n\n<<silently>> <<set $she =1>>\n<<endsilently>>

this <<cyclinglink "is not" "is">> about [[pronouns]]

[[no|both2]]

[[he|he4]] <<timedcontinue 1s>> [[she|she4]]

<<timedremove 3s>>--"but it's not grammatically correct"<<endtimedremove>><<timedremove 7s>><<timedinsert 5s>>--"but it's rather confusing"<<endtimedinsert>><<endtimedremove>><<timedinsert 9s>>--"but you're just one person"<<endtimedinsert>>\n\n\n\n<<timedcontinue 12s>>--"but can't one [[contain]] multitudes?"

[[he|he2]] [[she|she2]] [[they]]

[[no|no4]]\n<<timedcontinue 2.5s>> though once I would have said, "[[yes]]"

let's share this\n<<timedcontinue 3s>>while remaining [[different]]

<<fadeoutsound "children 2.mp3">><<timedcontinue 2s>>must we always be [[archeologists]]?

[[no|no5]]

[[no]]

[[he|no3]] <<timedcontinue 2s>> [[she|no3]] <<timedcontinue 2s>> [[ze]]

[[he|he2]]<<timedcontinue 2s>> [[she|she2]]<<timedcontinue 2s>> [[they]]

[[it|felt]] is <<cyclinglink "relation" "embodied" "political" "felt" end>>

[[no|both2]]

<<fadeinsound "twine 6.mp3">>[[negative space]]\n\n<<silently>>\n<<set $he =0>>\n<<set $she =0>>\n<<endsilently>>

[[he]] [[she]] [[it]]

<<fadeoutsound "club2.mp3">><<timedcontinue 4s>>[[he?]] <<timedcontinue 2s>> [[she?]] <<timedcontinue 2s>> [[they?]] <<timedcontinue 2s>> [[ze?]]

sometimes...<<timedcontinue 3s>> for safety...<<timedcontinue 3s>> or because it is better than what they call its [[opposite|no4]]

<<fadeinsound "electronic.mp3">>skin <<timedcontinue 2s>>crawls\n\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>gnawing\n\n<<timedcontinue 1.5s>>turn me inside out\n\n<<timedcontinue 1.5s>>exposed\n\n<<timedcontinue 1.5s>>and\n\n<<timedcontinue 1.5s>>[[shivering|exposed]]\n\n

[[no]]

be only hypothetical [[or]] poetic

<<fadeinsound "club2.mp3">><<timedremove 25s>>dancing in the Castro\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>he leaned into me\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>pulled me close\n\n<<timedcontinue 1s>>only to be interrupted\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>told I was not a man\n\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>to which he responded\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>with a deep kiss\n\n<<timedcontinue 1s>>only to be interrupted\n\n<<timedcontinue 2s>>as I was pushed away\n<<timedcontinue 1.5s>>felt a hand search for my breasts\n<<timedcontinue 1.5s>>and squeeze tightly\n<<timedcontinue 1.5s>>fingers dug into flesh\n<<timedcontinue 1.5s>>leaving bruises\n<<timedcontinue 1.5s>>and fear<<endtimedremove>>\n<<timedinsert 27s>>this is what I think of when you [[ask]] me out dancing<<endtimedinsert>>

real [[------]] don't [[------]]

<<timedremove 5s>>I can sift through my history\n<<timedcontinue 2.5s>>find the evidence of what was before<<endtimedremove>><<timedcontinue 6.5s>>what if it is all just [[earth]]?

negative space\n\nby maddox pratt\n\n<<timedcontinue 4s>>macros and programming assistance by [[leon arnott|http://l.j-factor.com/]]\n\n<<timedcontinue 3s>> music by [[Goodwill & Hook N Sling|https://soundcloud.com/whompo/goodwill-hook-n-sling-take-you-higher-whomp-club-mix]]\n[[Colin Brogan|https://soundcloud.com/search?q=electronic%20study%201b]]\n

--"I just don't understand how someone can want to be...nothing"\n\n<<timedcontinue 3.5s>>--"I guess it's not a matter of wanting...<<timedcontinue 2s>>nor is the [[nothing]] //nothing//